VIP’s of Slasherdom: Jessica
The Bitchy Girl is a common staple of slasher movies, and often they provide some of the best lines in their respective movies (see previous VIP, Wendy from Prom Night).
Thus, watching Sorority Row earlier, I feel it’s only right that Delta Phi president Jessica (Leah Pipes) should be the fifth inductee to the Slasherdom Hall of Whatever™.
Purpose: Covering her own ass over and above the interests of others around her.
Sass: Largely unmoved by the carnage occurring around her and the resulting deaths, Jessica is entirely responsible for the wit in this movie, lifting it beyond ‘just another slasher remake’ status to Mean Girls with a body count. Listen for the uber-sarcastic delivery of “Oh no, don’t go out there!”
Legacy: In a rare trend-buck, I’d advocate Jessica being one of the survivors of Sorority Row. Why? Because no sooner is she dispatched by the killer, the film enters a slightly problematic final act, with all the self-awareness and acidic wit gone. She was easily the most interesting character and even if she survived only to be arrested and led away in cuffs five minutes later, it would’ve made for a better outcome.
Nevertheless, Jessica – we love you. Here are your greatest hits: